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Simone Jill Baker (Simi)
Newbie
Username: Simi
Post Number: 17
Registered: 03-2005
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Monday, November 28, 2005 - 01:57 pm: | 
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Hello there,
Here at Disabled Parents Network, we regularly receive enquiries from disabled parents who are experiencing problems with getting their children to and from school. The issue may be that the parent is physically unable to do the school run, or it may be that public transport is inaccessible to them and / or the school is too far away to walk / wheel.
There seems to be an issue in trying to obtain the necessary support from either the Local Education Authority (LEA) or from Social Services.
Every Local Education Authority assists with getting disabled children to school (by taxi or other means), but if it is the PARENT who has the disability, the LEA cannot assist…..
Or do they???? I was made aware this weekend of one LEA who were assisting with getting the children of a disabled parent to school by taxi! However, this seems to be the exception rather than the rule.
In many individual cases which have been brought to the attention of Disabled Parents Network, when parents have approached the LEA for help, they’ve been told that as it is the parent who has the disability, and not the child, the LEA is unable to assist.
If the parent then approaches Social Services, there is an argument about whether it is the Adults Team who should provide the support, or whether it is the Children and Families Team who need to be involved. In the meantime, the parent is left still being unable to get their child to school
It is the LAW that parents send their children to school, and yet for disabled parents, there seem to be some bureaucratic barriers which seem designed to prevent them from being able to do so!
It seems that depending on where you live, you may or may not obtain the support you need to get your child to school.
Do any disabled parents out there, or any professionals working with disabled people/parents have any first-hand experiences they are willing to share with Disabled Parents Network and other Forum visitors? It would be great to try and build up a picture of how and where things are working well, and where there are parents who have received little or no support in this area. If you can contact me, I’d be grateful, and I’m happy to keep the details of any respondents totally confidential.
Look forward to hearing from you!
Simone Baker
(Vice-Chair of Disabled Parents Network) |
Anonymous
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Monday, November 28, 2005 - 05:42 pm: |
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hello my name is maria and i am a disabled parent with a 7 yr old daughter....i read your post and i thought id respond.....as for a month ago i was one of those parents that could not send their chlild to school... my daughter missed a month from school because i could'nt take her to the bus stop and i couldnt send her alone because she had ADHD...or did not have any $$ to be taking a taxi every day it was a 20 dollar ride from her school back and fourth...and i could not afford that because i have no income...so when the school noticed that my daughter was not in school they right away called me and threatened me to call social service and then social services came to my house and made me feel like i was the worst mom ever..they made seem like i was not giving any effort in getting her to school but i was i was asking people around and was willing to pay them out of my daughter child support $$ 50 a wk to take my daughter to school and bring her bk but no one wanted to do it. the people from social services wanted me to do things that i personally thought was crazy. for example tthey wanted me to tell a total stranger from the bus stop that i didnt even know my personal story and hand the my daughter so they could watch over her at the bus stop....then they wanted me to let her go with other kids from the building to the bus stop but i told them no because my daughters ADHD....and she could be a risk of getting hurt because she doesnt listen....then they suggested for my daughter to carry a portable chair to the bus stop so i could sit.so i told them that that was impossible because how was i going to bring the chair bk in the house if i had to walk with my crutches..well when i told them that they told me to put the chair in a bk pack so i told them if i hardly have a balance with my crutches when walking how could they expect me to carry a chair and balance that to well let me tell u they told me that i just didnt want to try anything but it wasnt true. then they said that because of my disability i was preventinng my daughter from going to school and being independent...so i got real mad at them cause they were even talking about courts and stuff anyways my last hope was just pack my bags and move back to my country were i could have the help of my mother and sister but it was something that i didnt want to do but i had no choice. but suddenly i found some that was willing to take my daughter to school temp at least until i got my things ready to go and this way she would not miss much school but the big thing was that this person was coming and hour and ahalf from us and i had to practically give her wk all my daughters child support $$$ in order to get her to school... after that i just wasnt ready to give up yet while this person was doing this i got in touch with a child advocate and she came to my home and i explained to her everything that was going on so she told me that what the school and everyone else was doing to me was unfair so thanks to her she fought the school the board of education and she managed to get my daughter a school to pick her up at the home all i do is go downstairs and wait in front of the home....but one big fear that i have since i was reported to social services is that they will always be checkigng up on us and i feel like they dont think im a good mother just because i couldnt get her to school and since according to them i was using my disabiliity against my daughters which that was and has never been true.. my daughter means the whole world to and if that was the case i would have given up and gone back to my country but instead i fought as hard as i could.....i personal feel that we as disabled have no right on anything or any types of help in order for us to live a normal life as possible with our children and i honestly thing thats all wrong.........
well thats my story i thought it might give u any ideas as of perhaps how some of us disabled go through.
sincerely
maria
stamford ct (USA) |
judy levick (Jude)
Newbie
Username: Jude
Post Number: 1
Registered: 01-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, January 20, 2006 - 12:07 am: |
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} HI MY NAME IS JUDE, I AM A DISABLED MUM WITH TWO FANTASTIC KIDS A DAUGHTER AGE 10 AND A SON AGE 6. WHEN MY SON STARTED AT NURSERY I STARTED GOING INTO SCHOOL TO HELP OUT WITH READING AND THINGS. I REALLY ENJOY IT BUT I DONT GET TO GO IN AS OFFEN NOW AS IT CAN BE VERY DIFFICULT FOR ME TO GET INTO SCHOOL. THE BUILDING IS FULL OF STEPS WITHOUT HANDRAILS AND THERE IS NO LIFT OR DISABLED LOO. AS I CAN WALK WITH A STICK I CAN GET AROUND THE SCHOOL (WITH SOME DIFFICULTY)
BUT RECENTLY THE SCHOOL STARTED AN AFTER SCHOOL CLUB WITCH IS BEING RUN BY ONE OF THE PARENTS SHE OFFERD BOTH MY CHILDREN CASSUAL PLACES IN THE CLUB. I REGISTERED MY CHILDREN BUT WE HAVE NOT USED THE CLUB YET. THE MAIN REASON FOR THIS IS BECAUSE THE ENTERANCE THAT THE AFTER SCHOOL CLUB HAS TO USE IS COMPLETELY INACCESSABLE FOR ME.THE AFTERSCHOOL CLUB MANAGER SAYS SHE CAN BRING THE CHIDREN OUT TO ME AT THE END OF EACH SESSON BUT THIS MEANS THAT I WILL NOT BE ABLE TO HELP OUT AT THE CLUB WITCH HAS UPSET MY KIDS AND AT THE MOMENT IT MEANS THAT THE MANAGER HAS ONE LESS HELPER, I WAS JUST WONDERING IF ANYONE ELSE HAD BEEN IN A SIMULAR SITUATION AND IF YOU HAVE ANY ADVICE YOU COULD PASS ON. THANKS VERY MUCH. JUDE  |
Sarah Gittins
Unregistered guest
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, February 10, 2006 - 05:54 pm: |
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I have 3 gorgeous girls aged 5, 7 & 9 and they are fantastic. About 18 months ago the school that my girls went to changed their headteacher and since then my relationship with school just went from bad to worse.
I had been unable to drive for quite a while and I was having to ask my mum to drive us to and from school. I gained permission from the previous headteacher to use the school car park, as there was nowhere to park within reach of the school gates for me. I use elbow crutches and a wheelchair. The headteacher was very supportive and even organised for the car park to be extended and a disabled parking space to be allocated. I'm sure this was not done purely for my benefit but I was certainly a factor in the equation. This worked well and eventually I got my own vehicle adapted and I was finally able to take my kids to school on my own which I felt was a huge achievement.
However it wasn't to last. With the change of headteacher came a change of attitude towards me and my difficulties. Suddenly the headteacher decided that other parents were breaking school rules and using the newly extended car park to drop their own children off in the mornings. (I have to point out that the school in question is built in the middle of 2 sharp S bends and parking was a nightmare for everyone). One morning a parent verbally abused the headteacher when approached and asked not to use the car park. Whilst I accept that this was totally unacceptable, so was the head's response. She rang me that day at home to say that from now on the car park gates would be locked and that if I needed access I would have to ring school. I was gobsmacked at this and really didn't know how to respond. I was locked out of my own children's school!
The tale goes on for quite a while, but to cut it short we tried calling school as we got there, but the only key was held by the caretaker and he couldn't be found 9 times out of 10. So we had to wait outside on the S bend as I was told I had to wait right outside the gate in case anyone else tried to sneak in!! AFter nearly having a double decker bus parked on the back seat of the car, I decided enough was enough. So then the compromise was that the gates would be shut and not locked, and that my daughter (aged 7 1/2 at this point) would have to get out and open them. Well firstly it was dangerous for her to get out of the car on her own in such a dangerous spot and secondly she couldn't manage to move the damn gates as they were so heavy!
I got nowhere trying to reason with the headteacher and eventually wrote to the governors. A meeting was arranged and I was told in no uncertain terms that the gates would remain closed and that it was my problem how I got my children into school and not theirs. The only compromise they were prepared to make was to have the gates moved in a couple of foot so that you could just about pull into the space in front of them to get out of the way of coming traffic to be able to get out and open them.
In the end I decided that I would just have to get school before they closed the gates. So every morning we sat in the school car park from 8.30 am waiting for school to start at 8.55am, and then every afternoon I had to arrive before 2.45pm and wait for the children to finish at 3.10pm. Not only was this wait an annoyance it was also painful for me as sitting is the worst thing I can do for my condition. When I pointed this out, I was then told that permission would be given for the girls to be late every day and that I should bring them at 9.10am every day after assembly and collect them at 3.30pm from the school foyer. This was really upsetting both for me and the children. Seeing their friends in the playground every morning and their mum waiting for them at the end of the day was really important both to the girls and to me. It was the only time I had human contact, as getting out and about is really difficult. So I declined this offer and continued to sit and wait, which I did until I decided enough was enough and moved them from the school.
School had gone from being a safe and happy place to yet another establishment that was inaccessible to us as a family. It affected not only my relationship with school but also the children's. They knew how upset I was and they knew that school was the cause of it, therefore it affected the way that they saw school and the staff. We were moving house and had thought that we would leave the girls at the school and travel backwards and forwards with them. However, we changed out minds and took great pleasure in telling school that we were leaving and believe me the headteacher could not contain her joy on hearing the news! We were just one big problem to her that she really didn't know how to handle.
My girls are now at a lovely small village school and the staff could not be any more helpful. They are both understanding and supportive both of me and the girls and our needs, limitations and 'differences'. The decision to move them was absolutley the right one, and one that we have never regretted.
There are schools out there that are accomodating and understanding, but unfortunately there are those that do not take the time or trouble to understand a disability or the needs of either parents or children.
I want my children to grow up in a supportive and encouraging atmosphere and I am lucky enough to have found it.
Thanks for giving me the opportunity to air my views, Sarah |
Terri Balon (Terri)
Newbie
Username: Terri
Post Number: 1
Registered: 02-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, February 22, 2006 - 10:23 pm: |
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It might be worth looking into whether school s are breaking part 3 Goods and Services of DDA as well as SENDA certainly with the new DDA 2005 primary schools have prepared and pubblished their disability equality Scheeme bu December 07 and as part of that they have to actively involved dfisabled people abd their family members. Their school improvemtn needs also to show active plan to improve school accessibilty as they have now to be proactive in promoting disablity euqality rather than reactive.
I suggest contacting a local organisation of disabled people although there is concern that parenting is often missed out as an issue even within these organisation.
I am a parent Governor and have to say have very gradually had quite a positive impact on my school. They automatically provide me with large print information for example.
Hope this is useful
Terri |
Anonymous
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Saturday, March 11, 2006 - 01:07 pm: |
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Hi. I'm Sara. I have 2 great kids, 10 and 7. I have MS and up and till 2 years ago I could struggle and drive them to school - although I did fall a good few times!! For the last year I.ve been totally wheelchair bound so things are obviously harder!
My husband works full time 5 days a week and starts before school and finnishes well after. The local LEA refuse to help us out and suggested we pay for taxis to get them there - we're not about to let them go with strangers and we certainly can't afford it at £8 each way!
All the LEA kept repeating over and over and over was "it's the parents responsibility to get their children to school and if you don't we'll take you to court and possibly take them away from you"!!! How dare they even suggest such a thing, Iam only in a wheelchair! I know it's my responsibility that's why I rang them because I cannot get them there myself and I need help!!
I now have to use part of my Direct Payments hours to get them to and fro leaving less time for my personal care!
HELP PLEASE!!!! |
LisaBerry
Unregistered guest
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, April 26, 2006 - 09:07 pm: |
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Hi I'm Lisa, wheelchair user & single mum to a 7 yr old son with special needs, and I have exactly the same problem, any advice would be welcome. |
NITA ABIKARRAN (Nita)
Newbie
Username: Nita
Post Number: 1
Registered: 03-2007
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Thursday, March 29, 2007 - 07:27 pm: |
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i am a single parent of 3 and i have a lot of problems with my kids school i dont drive and have to rely on others to help me to get ny kids to school most mornings that means they r a little late. every day they get into trouble and even though i have explained to the headteacher she doesnt understand, she has now reported me to the social services cause they r late and im worried. sometimes i can walk okwith 1 elbow crutch but i use a mobility scooter on the days i cant get help but they mayb dont believe me. this is driving me insane as i have to go into hospital soon and i dont sleep at night through worry. i have hip dyplasia that cant really b corrected by surgery and im in constant pain i also suffer with depression and restless leg syndrome. any good advice ore comments would help me so much .thanx |
judy levick (Jude)
Newbie
Username: Jude
Post Number: 3
Registered: 01-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, March 30, 2007 - 12:31 pm: |
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Hi Nita I read your message this morning. firstly can I say I think the headteacher at your children's school has been very unfair to you and your family. You said that you have explaind your situation to the headteacher, if you have not put this in writing can i suggest that you do that as the school can't ignore a letter. I suggest that if you have to attend meatings with Social services then make sure you have a solicitor with you. This just means that you will have someone to explain your rights and what you can do to resolve the situation.
As far as I can see this is a case of the school needing to provide you with reasonable ajustment for your situation.
If you find that you still have a prolem with the headteacher then you can go to the governors or the LEA.
I'm not an expert but i am a disabled mum of two children.
I hope what i have said is of some help to you.
GOOD LUCK
Let me know how u get on. you can leave a message on the site or you can email me.
all the best
JUDE X
EMAIL loopylou34@blueyonder.co.uk } |
CLARE STEVENS (Parentspower)
Newbie
Username: Parentspower
Post Number: 1
Registered: 09-2007
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, September 26, 2007 - 01:34 pm: |
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Dear All, I have read with interest the problems of getting children to and from school and wondered if since the postings, anyone has found a 'magic' solution. I work with disabled parents and one major recurring issue is lack of transport. 'Anonymous' mentioned in march that she uses part of her Direct payments to pay someone to take over this role - it this 'allowed'? Also, most of our parents want to be involved in the school run anyway... Please help - we have contacted so many people and come up against so many brick walls...any info would be a help |
CLARE STEVENS (Parentspower)
Newbie
Username: Parentspower
Post Number: 2
Registered: 09-2007
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, September 26, 2007 - 01:34 pm: |
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Dear All, I have read with interest the problems of getting children to and from school and wondered if since the postings, anyone has found a 'magic' solution. I work with disabled parents and one major recurring issue is lack of transport. 'Anonymous' mentioned in march that she uses part of her Direct payments to pay someone to take over this role - it this 'allowed'? Also, most of our parents want to be involved in the school run anyway... Please help - we have contacted so many people and come up against so many brick walls...any info would be a help |
karen little (Smurfette)
Newbie
Username: Smurfette
Post Number: 2
Registered: 05-2007
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, September 26, 2007 - 04:36 pm: |
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Hi i have trouble doing the school run and at first the school paid a member of staff to pick and drop my children of but now i pay the same member of staff using my direct payments... |
Lorraine
Newbie
Username: Lorraine
Post Number: 1
Registered: 04-2008
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Monday, April 21, 2008 - 12:32 pm: |
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Hi, I just signed up to DPN today after "discussions" with the boss of the "homecare" team of my local Social Work Department. I have been an amputee for 34 years, however after a routine revision of my amputation in 2002 I developed Complex Regional Pain Syndrome/Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy.
Basically this means i suffer from chronic pain and on "good" days use a stick to help me get around.
I have 2 children , teenage son and 6yr old daughter. We have been given transport provision for my daughter since she started nursery school (this was at age 2 and half, through SureStart Scheme). The "drivers", and their superiors have always been supportive. However, we have had a few teething problems lately in that a couple of the team members were coming to collect my daughter at 8.20am, the school is only 5-10mins journey by car (depending on traffic). Which meant my daughter was 1 of only 3 youngsters in the playground for at least 15 minutes.!!. This upset my daughter, which obviously then upset me. As a result of questioning the reasoning and possible safety issues arising from this early pickup, we've now been told that "drving my daughter to school is no longer in their remit. Although they are not taking the service away from us yet - it WILL have to be reviewed in the near future.
Help!. So now not only do I have the guilt trip from my daughter of "but everyone else's mummy takes them to school". We know have the worry of how to get her there at all.
I have to use all my "favors" from friends and family in the afternoon to collect her from school, or get her/brother to activities when I am unable. My husband is self-employed, already works ridiculously long hours during the work to allow him to be around to help at the weekend.
Any one got any suggestions of how to go about making sure my child gets to school, on time and safely!?
Any advice welcomed
Regards
Lorraine |
Dawnmrobson
Newbie
Username: Dawnmrobson
Post Number: 3
Registered: 08-2007
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Monday, April 21, 2008 - 05:32 pm: |
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Hi
Im in a wheelchair due to spinal injury and have three children, I had a huge issue relying on other parents to take my children to school until i decided to get a childminder, it costs very little money and they pick the children up from me and take them to school and also picks them up and drops them at my home, this is very reassuring for me and my children as the childminder knows the children well and they like her, plus they look like all the other children going to school with the same person every day. I also take them and pick them up whenever i can myself, although it is agony for me as i push my chair myself its lovely to see the childrens faces when they see me picking them up. Also another idea is to get a mobility scooter, which i have thought of doing myself, i would feel strange in it as they are what old people use but if it means i can take my children to school and back myself we would all be much happier! hope this helps!
Dawn |
Morveryn
Newbie
Username: Morveryn
Post Number: 1
Registered: 02-2008
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Monday, April 21, 2008 - 05:54 pm: |
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Hi Lorraine,
I have rheumatoid arthritis and I use crutches to get around. Getting my daughter (who is 6) to and from school is a problem. The school seem completely oblivious to the needs of disabled parents.
My husband was self employed for a long time but last summer he took a job close to our home (literally 5 mins walk) so he could help me more. He is now employed (instead of self employed) and its going ok so far. He is able to take our daughter to school most mornings on his way to work. Mornings are a real struggle for me so this is is a huge help.
I have a Blue Badge and have had to take issue with the school several times over people without a blue badge parking in the 2 disabled parking spaces. |
Terri
DPN Volunteer
Username: Terri
Post Number: 13
Registered: 02-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Monday, April 21, 2008 - 11:11 pm: |
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Hi
Just some general thoughts.
I had a problem getting my daughter to school in October 05 which resulted in my accessing a local nursing charity who funded taxis. But it took a lot of hard work and the help of friends.
I have recently delivered training to Supply and Transport staff(passenger escorts for disabled children on specioal transport to special schools), in a local authority. Whilst talking to the line manager about the training I raised the issue of transport to for children of disabled parents and appartently they do now provide on a case by case basis, so I would now qualify for transport for my children,
So it might be worth contacting that department within education. It would be interesting to see what their 'Young Carers' strategy says about supporting children with disabled parents too.
The most obvious one I guess is to go for direct payments and include that is your assessment. Depending on the social worker you might get lucky, as I did, and have good one.
If you are a member of DPN you have access to publications can help, such as 'They Said What' which would help in an assessment. So join if you are not.
Under the new legisaltion around their Disablity Equality Schemes they have make reasonable adjustments. and you could also use the Every Child Matters. A friend was allowed to park on the staff car park, wait until the children started going in and having watched the child enter school left. Then was again allowed on the car park to pick her up. Unfortunately this did cause the child some difficulties with other children through the attitudes of other parents.
You can ask the school if they could write a letter out to parents asking them not to park in the accessible space or to put it in their newsletter. I friend also parked up behind someone in a space who did not have a badge.
Sadly it is a big problem with school who do want to help but have no control over the inconsiderate behaviour of other people.
One of the ways to raise awareness is to become involved as much as possible in the school community, become a governor.
I hope this has at least given some food for thought and apologise the length |
Mafeb
Newbie
Username: Mafeb
Post Number: 3
Registered: 03-2008
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Monday, April 21, 2008 - 10:17 pm: |
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I only have one in school at this point, but my challenge is my 17m/o who will run away if I let her walk. I have severe fibromyalgia and can't handle getting a stroller in/out of car then in/out of school. I use a cloth wrap to tie my 17 m/o on my back whilst bringing my 3.5 y/o in and out of school. I park in the handicapped spots but if those are blocked, I need to have another parent sit with my little one (while she screams  ) b/c I can't handle the walk.
Melissa |
Puzz1ed1
Administrator
Username: Puzz1ed1
Post Number: 20
Registered: 11-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Tuesday, April 22, 2008 - 06:40 am: |
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Hi all
I've been reading this thread with great interest over the past few days but held of replying as I wanted to see what others had to say :-)
This is a big issue for disabled parents, and we receive many calls and emails about it. I'm really grateful for all the excellent advice that's been posted recently - as ICT manager I love to see the forums being used as they're intended :-)
If you've not already done so, then have a look at this post to read about the new guidance that has been issued to schools :-)
As for blue badge parking, if the school is providing spaces then they also have a responsibility to ensure they are not misused. Let's be honest, it happens everywhere! I know of many badge holders who use the "block 'em in until they learn" approach though I've not tried it myself lol
I'm glad Terri mentioned Direct Payments - if this is something you are unfamiliar with then please get in contact with us for more information.
Mafeb> can we chat some more?! As well as being involved in DPN, I'm also running a couple of FM support groups and working with FMAUK. One issue I'm looking at currently, though, is FM and parenting.... be good to chat more!
Steve
Steve Westrop
DPN Support Services Team
& Local Link, Thurrock
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Lorraine
Newbie
Username: Lorraine
Post Number: 2
Registered: 04-2008
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Tuesday, April 22, 2008 - 09:35 am: |
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Morning everyone
thanks to all have replied to my first posting on this matter.
Thanks to " puzzled" read the info regarding the new guidance for schools.
I get the feeling that, in my area anyway, they all agree that provision must be made, but the argument is ,what budget pays for the provision!?
Botht the schools my children attend have excellent policies in place. I have had no problems getting to parents evenings etc. Secondary School always utilise the ground floor only on these occasions. I am always madee feel welcome at the primary school, I'm on the PTA, help at school discos, activity rooms, trips when able. |
Shanta_at_dppi
Forum Member
Username: Shanta_at_dppi
Post Number: 9
Registered: 06-2007
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Tuesday, April 22, 2008 - 11:16 am: |
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Hello Lorraine, Dawn, Morveryn, Terri, Mafeb and Puzzled!
I've been following your discussions with interest as home to school travel is an issue that we would like to feature in the Disability, Pregnancy and Parenthood International journal.
We are planning to run a feature reproducing an extract of the new guidance that Terri mentions (copied again below at the end of this message) alongside comments from disabled parents stating what the guidance means for them. This may include comments on how the guidance has helped disabled parents secure transport, how disabled parents plan to use the guidance or how the guidance would have helped disabled parents with older children had it been in place at the time that they were negotiating these arrangements for their children.
I would like to publish a selection of comments. If any or all of you would like your comments to be included, please email me at shanta@dppi.org.uk. I can either edit the comments posted here with your permission, or you can email me something new for inclusion. I'd love to hear from as many parents as possible!
Extract from Home to school travel and transport guidance issued by the DFES follows:
Disabled parents
87. Local authorities should note that since
December 2006, the Disability Discrimination
Act 2005, has placed a duty on the public
sector to promote equality of opportunity
for disabled people and to eliminate
discrimination. This duty is anticipatory,
meaning that public authorities must review
all their policies, practices, procedures and
services to make sure they do not discriminate
against disabled people, and to ensure that
all their services are planned with disabled
people’s needs fully considered in advance.
88. In the Department’s view, this means that
local authorities will be under a duty to
amend their home to school transport policy
if, for example, that policy relied on disabled
parents accompanying their children along
a walking route for it to be considered safe,
and where the parents’ disability prevented
them from doing so. In such circumstances,
a reasonable adjustment would be for the
local authority to provide free home to school
transport for the children of disabled parents.
I look forward to hearing from you all!
Shanta
email: shanta@dppi.org.uk
web: www.dppi.org.uk |
Morveryn
Newbie
Username: Morveryn
Post Number: 2
Registered: 02-2008
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, April 23, 2008 - 08:42 am: |
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RE:parking at school
The school is better now than when my daughter first started there. A change of Headmistress seems to have helped!
They allow me and a couple of others to park on site and have sent out letters and put in EVERY newsletter that other people must not park there, but it still happens. There is noone to monitor the car park so its a bit of a free for all and quite dangerous at times.
We all know that accessible spaces are abused everywhere but I feel here, at the school they really have duty to make sure they are not. What sort of message is it sending to the children in their care? |
Terri
DPN Volunteer
Username: Terri
Post Number: 14
Registered: 02-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, April 25, 2008 - 03:08 pm: |
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HI
At some school I know that the caretakers hang around and prompt people to move or put a couple of orange cones up until the person they know comess.
It is a bit of a lottery of attitudes of the school/people/staff.
I would also like to share some positives, even though they might sadly demonstrate a bit of a lottery.
I was undecided as to which thread to put this on but fell that DP can be used for this difficulty where necessary.
Although I am quite involved in various thing aside from DPN, I was reluctant, despite knowing all about them to take up Direct Payments. I have always been detrmined to 'manage' rather than let services anywhere near my family because of previous bad experiences.
However it got to the point where my children were really losing out and that is what eventually swung it. Knowledgte indicated that I was in for a battle asking quite specifically, as I was, for help around the house and parentin g issues.
So having got my dairy written with what I did, how long it took me, timings and where I needed help I was set.
The social worker came, looked at my diary and after talking for a while offered me 7 hours. Well it was a bit of a let down, I was all fired up for a fight with the 'And They Said What' booklet.
She was ectremely good an prompted/prodded me when I faltered at various points until I finally got it set up.
I have recently applied for more hours that are for me to get out, a 'social' life, and to my amaxement, knowing my authority was not hopefull. I got slightly more than I expected. Diaries are a brilliant tool.
I have also had a really excellent experience with OTS top recently, in that it took less than 6 months for them to assess and install grab rails in the bathroom for my daughter.
Sadly I think a lot depends on the attitude of the person you are dealing with.
Terri |
Middlesmum
Forum Member
Username: Middlesmum
Post Number: 10
Registered: 06-2008
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Thursday, August 07, 2008 - 01:20 am: |
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I just wanted to say that i had a brilliant experience as a disabled mum taking my children to school. I managed to get accomadation close to the school initially so could use my electric chair to walk my 2 children to school with my baby on my lap(belted in). When finally I had to move into a bungalow we moved on to direct payments and the lady who helped me started at 8 and did the school run. It was hard in a way because I had to stop fighting and allow someone else to take them but it meant I said good bye and they went cheerfully and I knew the personal assistant totally respected my wishes. As for the attitudes you come up against dealing with people's lack of understanding I finally decided this month that I was going to stop getting angry with what other people did not understand and instead explain clearly what I wanted and why and not allow things to get to me. I found I would be cross all the time lol.. you know that person who pulls up into the disabled bay just to quickly post something  ..lol...or like the other day the gardeners who cut a hedge leaving the remains all over the path so I had to cross over in my chair and use other side when they could have been a little more considerate. Or the shops that are wheelchair accessible but then you get stuck amongst all the clothes rails.. I decided I can't change the attitude of anyone else but I can not allow other peoples ignorance of my condition and how to behave towards me make me feel so down. When I manage to be firm with my neurologist I will have finally cracked it..firm but polite..firm but polite..if I say it enough maybe I will be able to do it  lol.. I DIGRESS...its ALL about COMMUNICATING WHAT YOU NEED AND NOT PRESUMING PEOPLE SHOULD KNOW.  People do not live disability day in and out generally and those blank expressions may be irritating but I am going to try to look at those expressions as a blank canvass for me to colour in with info. Thing is people don't let you readily paint on their canvass unless you are polite..so going to take my paint brush out and use it gently . This, I have found (when I have managed it), works when communicating with schools/unis/secondary schools/colleges. a bit of honest painting  ..My next hurdle is dealing with university for myself and as a mum already worrying about if I will be able to go see my son get his degree certificate in a wheelchair..and he's only starting this september!! Feel a bit embarassed cos his degree is in strength and conditioning and coaching moving on to elite sports people in 3rd year. But wont by the time I have to see him get his award!! onwards and upwards |
Morveryn
Forum Member
Username: Morveryn
Post Number: 11
Registered: 02-2008
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Saturday, August 09, 2008 - 03:25 pm: |
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>>I am going to try to look at those expressions as a blank canvass for me to colour in with info. Thing is people don't let you readily paint on their canvass unless you are polite..so going to take my paint brush out and use it gently .<<
I really loved this part, such a good idea and put in a lovely way. |
Terri
Forum Member
Username: Terri
Post Number: 19
Registered: 02-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Monday, August 11, 2008 - 06:10 pm: |
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HI
I would refer you back to Shanta's post in April and suggest you ask them for a copy of their young Carer's strategy. YEs!!!I know its an obnoxious phrase but there are some authorities who either in their Access Strategy of Young Carers Strategy mention this issue.
One authority mention in in their Access stragtefy and WOW!! guess why, the Assistant Director responsible for it was Deaf Others are more ambiguous and soem mention supporting parents, and even disabled parent.
I found out by chance that our Supply and Transport Dept within Education department (they deal with supply teachers and escorts for disabled children to and from school), in certain circumnstances provide support for a disabled parent, which is not what I was told when I desperately needed it in Octover 2005. I was told it was ONLY for disabled children.
The other thing is ask for an increase in your DP to vocer it. Write a diary of what you do, how long it takes you to do it and where you need help. Do not under any circumstances put down that you have help from partners etc as you can argue this is not always garaunteed if the person giving the support goes away etc. Its about mainitaining your independence enabling you to do what you want when you want with the right support. |
Babyblueeyes84
Forum Member
Username: Babyblueeyes84
Post Number: 6
Registered: 06-2010
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Tuesday, June 22, 2010 - 03:21 pm: |
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DISSAPLINING MY CILD
Hello! to anyone that can help.
I have a 19 month old little boy named Logan. My everyday condition is CP. I DONT! agree with smaking a child so Logan has a naughty corner at the moment, he goes there for 30 seconds but as he gets older Logan will go there for one minute per age - for example when he is 5 he will go there for 5 minutes, but the problem I'm having is when I put him there for something he did wrong he smacks me, once I've put him there. hope someone can help
Jacqui |
Gildedcage
Forum Member
Username: Gildedcage
Post Number: 8
Registered: 06-2010
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, June 23, 2010 - 10:01 am: |
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Sort of a different tangent there, but when my son pulled that (and more often than not he didn't just smack me, but tore my hair out, bit me, and kicked me in the face, yay autism) I added a minute for each time he continued to act up. I think 30 seconds isn't really that long IMO, and adding minutes per age won't really work either - add minutes on per INFRACTION not age, and that gets the point across better.
Good luck. |
Terri
Regular Poster+
Username: Terri
Post Number: 83
Registered: 02-2006
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Wednesday, June 23, 2010 - 12:19 pm: |
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Not usre if this will be of any use!!
I used to hold my daughter at arm's length, when at 18months she went through an awful biting phase, ask her to say sorry then tell her it upset and hurt me when she did it. Sometimes she'd do it then bite again. So as she always wvery cuddly (and SSHH!! still is at 15) I started asking her before a cuddle. She didn't like it andstopped.
Would it be possible for you to hold him at arms length, not necessarily for the whole time but for some in order to get the point across.
It may not work for you and your little one course!!
Terri |
Siobhan
Newbie
Username: Siobhan
Post Number: 1
Registered: 10-2011
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Thursday, October 27, 2011 - 08:12 pm: |
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Hello everyone, Im new here. I joined expecting a magical answer to what rights I had as a disabled mum getting her daughter to school. Reading through the thread with interest it seems there is no answer. We live in a very rural part of Scotland (nearest town and taxi firm and childminder 40mins drive away.) My husband recently started working from home so as he was here for myself and 6 year old. This means dropping her to school is no longer a problem for us but picking her up can be a bit difficult for him sometimes if he is dealing with customers, phone calls, etc. The school bus driver has been bringing her home as a favour for the past 18mnth. He didnt want to do it officially since he is dealing with his max no of children and doesnt want to loose his contract. However the headmaster phoned yesterday to say that might need to stop. I think they have failed to realise that hubby is "working" from home and think now we are taking advantage. If they withdraw this service we are going to be stuck on quite afew days out of the week. Im wheelchair bound and more often han not housebound. I wish they had told this info before we took the house of the market (we were planning to move to a more suitable urban location when I became wheelchair dependant at first, but in 18mnths no viewers and things seemed to have settled nicely.) It would also have been good to have the info when hubby was setting up business, not now he is established 6 mnths in. If he knew he would have to shut up the business for part of the afternoon for a school run we might of thought twice about it being financially feesable. Before speaking to the school I just wondered where I stood. Is it still very much a gray area? I have read the directgov website and all that is said is "make reasonable adjustment" which isnt the most help in the world. Any new info on this matter would be greatly recieved. Thank you in advance for any replies. And thank you for such a brilliant servise - its nice to know people care. |
Jennypenny
Regular Poster
Username: Jennypenny
Post Number: 51
Registered: 09-2008
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, October 28, 2011 - 03:03 pm: |
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Hi Siobhan,
Can ask where you live in Scotland? or what council district you are in? I'm East Ayrshire and to be honest, they're not very 'forward thinking' on this matter although that being said, I did manage to get them to agree transport for both my kids (after a lot of arguing to/fro i might add). EAC has a 1 mile radius outwith which you automatically qualify for the Home to School service but as I was just under that, they initially refused point blank. I contact my local coucillor (waste of space) and took it up with the department themselves. Best think I would advise is to find out who the transport officer is for your council area (assuming that you don't qualify automatically) and take the case directly to them. In my case, the school said it wasn't their issue (although they did support my application) and at the first, the council said it wasn't theirs either (no surprise there eh?) but in the end, my perseverance paid off and I got them both picked up and brought home. Initially, I had to pay for the service (which I could ill afford to do) and yet taxi's and buses went by our house half empty after picking up at the farms - nuts!! This is definately an issue that needs resolved and quickly!! PS - You'll find that the directgov site applies in the main to England and Wales thanks to our 'devolved' parliament. Unfortunately, finding information on the Scottish Government site is a bit like searching for a needle in a hay stack and I even contacted them about it and asked if they had a similar policy to the 'home to school guidelines' that down south were issued - guess what? they haven't! In the end though, the decision was made by the transport manager - If your in EAC, I can send you his details...
good luck hun, it's a horrible fight to have along with all the other stresses/strains that we have...
Jen |
Ally2319
Newbie
Username: Ally2319
Post Number: 4
Registered: 09-2010
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, October 28, 2011 - 04:37 pm: |
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Hi there!
Have read the posts regarding this and sympathise fully with everybody having experienced similar difficulties and frustrations myself as a disabled parent. However I hope that the following information may help somebody out there on this as it is a total disgrace that there is no consistent approach to this matter. We live in Scotland and out local authority stopped the service without notice and informed us that they would transport only 1 of our children which was ridiculous for obvious reasons. Councillors were generally completely useless and in our case only caused us far more distress. We did the usual stuff at contacting our MP/MSP but their hands were tied although in fairness they did attempt to resolve the matter as best they could with little effect. So I decided to challenge them legally using what was available with the help of my hubby. There are 2 areas under the Equality Act which you can use to argue your case. One is blatant disability discrimination as your local authority (la) cannot provide a service to a nnon-disabled parent and not provide it to you. Also as your children no doubt help you due to your disability as mine do (helping me in/out of bed, getting dressed etc) they are or at least can be defined as carers. This then falls under Associative Discrimination which basically means that as they are associated with a disabled person but are not necessarily disabled themselves they are being discriminated against due to disability being in the area in question. I did argue it and ran it past the Scottish Human Rights Commission who were brilliant. They were also deeply concerned at the treatment we were receiving and were willing to take on our case should our own efforts have failed.I also linked up with charities and realised that very little information was out there at all.I would suggest emailing Scottish Human Rights Commission as they confirmed whether or not the approach we were taking legally was viable or not which was a brillaint support at the time. We were told the ususal stuff by our la, that they were not responsible for getting our children to and from scholl, which they are, except not under the Education Act as they originally stated. they also said that we had to pay for any service we took from them which is actually legally incorrect, as technically that means that they are charging us for using a service because we are disabled, when nnon-disabled people whose children are transported and are also not disabled but are receiving transport for other reasons such as family breakdown etc
Basically they are not allowed to charge you for a service that they are obliged to provide under law. The two pieces of legislation are under the Equality Act and are as follows:
(a) Regarding your la attempting to charge you for the transport service the Act states this - '....if you are at a substantial disadvantage compared with someone who isn't disabled, reasonable changes ('adjustments') must be made by your employer or someone providing goods or services. the new law makes it clear that you can't be asked to pay the costs of making reasonable adjustments.'
The reasonable adjustment is transporting your children to school and is the service provided by your la.
(b) If your children assist in your care and can be considered carers then the Associative Discrimination area can be used as follows:
'If you are looking after someone who is elderly or disabled, the law will protect you against direct discrimination because of your caring responsibilities. This is becuase you're counted as being 'associated' with someone who is protected by the law because of their age or disability. You're already protected from discrimination and harassment if they happen at work but the new law will also protect you, if you are caring for a disabled person:
-when you shop for goods
-when you ask for services
-when you get services
-when you use facilities like public transport.
Therefore, it was due to my disability that my children could not get to school and as they are associated to me and my disability then they are being Associatively discriminated against.
Hope this helps and this is only part of the legislation availabe as the Human Rights Act right to family life can also be used.
We sent letters in the form of emails to the Education department head and the Chief Executive of our la and they backed down given our legal arguement as they realised that they would have to write to us and state clearly why they refused to provide the transport taking this legislation into account and they could'nt do it. So really hopes this helps somebody else. Have to say it was one of the most stressful experiences of my life and all because some eejit couldn't apply some common sense!!! Thanks for reading this and take care everyone! |
Vikki
Regular Poster+
Username: Vikki
Post Number: 159
Registered: 12-2008
Rating: N/A
Votes: 0 (Vote!) | | Posted on Friday, October 28, 2011 - 04:51 pm: |
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Ally
Thank you for providing other parents in Scotland with your experience and advice. That is really useful !
Well done to you for sticking to your guns!!
Vik |
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